What's the deal with the blurring line?

Sometimes, what I read seems so real that I'm not always sure it didn't really happen!
For example, I am quite certain that Marcellus really never was the same after The Robe.

Sunday, August 06, 2006

The tale continues. . .

Tonight I went to the dead apple pile, armed with plastic bags and wasp spray. I was hoping that I had timed my venture with a sleepy time for wasps. At first, I only saw a few. I took the nearby apples and began to spray wasps who came too near.

Sprayed wasps definitely die. But their brothers do not.

I heard waspy sounds from inside the plastic bag on the ground. Then it was that I knew that I had picked up wasp-bearing apples unaware! I sprayed the bag.

Thoroughly, just to be sure. But then I didn't want to touch it. I got a new bag and tried to proceed with a little more caution, spraying as I went. One bold wasp was spared the spray, and came at me head on! Honest! Heading for my nose! I took a dive away just in time, as he was 3" from my nose.

Enough, I said! Let there be dead apples that rot and kill the grass! Let others boldly go where I fear to go! I came in and reported to the one who fears no flying insect.

In the house, as I held my final bag of a paltry few apples, I heard the unmistakable sound of wasp wing against Walmart plastic! Wasp in my bag! Wasp in my bag! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!! To the garbage! To the garbage! In the bag! Tie up the black bag! As I return to the house, I still hear the more distant sound of wasp wing on plastic. I don't feel so good about going in the garage, knowing a wasp in a bag can likely find a way out. And when he does, he is not likely to be a very happy camper. But as Scarlett O'Hara would say, "I'll think about that tomorrow!".

More on Wasps

I have a vague memory of Papa and the Bees, but I'm not sure if I remember the incident or remember hearing the story, it being one of those family folk tales, oft repeated over the years.

For Michelle, I am happy that there was only a single bee. Bees should not be in houses. Period.

There is another wasp tale in the making perhaps. I fear the wasps are building a nest on the inside of our storm door. On two occasions, I have seen wasps appear to enter the house on top of the storm door. But they do not appear on the other side.

The first time, I saw one go over the door, and the open house door was right behind him. I ws sure he was inside. I went to bed wondering where in the house the wasp was hiding. But that was days ago, and I think he must not have actually gone in, or else, he is of a particularly mean variety, and he is waiting until he thinks I forgot.

A couple days ago, I was speaking through the storm door with a political candidate on a hot day. He saw a wasp go over the door and I instantly closed the door in his face (sorry!) I came out the garage, knowing that said wasp was trapped between the storm door and the door. Armed with wasp killer, I approached the door. The political candidate opened the door, but the wasp was nowhere to be seen. He said he had probably gone down into a hollow part of the door. This is a fearsome thought, but I think it is a job for a Man, and not a political candidate sort of man, but a Husband. I'm a little wary of the front door for now.

When does the first freeze occur?

Friday, August 04, 2006

Of Wasps and Apples

I had to do a nasty task today. It was the Dreaded Apple Colony in the back yard. I am not sure why if it's not my tree, I still have to clean up the apples. You might remember from previous years very high counts of apples picked from the grass. I have not picked any at all this year. Unfortunately, the ground under the tree is simply crowded with dead apples.
Some are completely brown and flattened by the Slash and Burn Boys who come every week to mow grass and anything else in their path. Others are still quite yellow, perhaps having dropped only today or yesteday. All in all, it is a disgusting task, unless the apples have just fallen. My hands are covered with grocery bags, I hold my breath, I stoop down low and begin scraping apple corpses off the grass. Yuk!!! I notice a wasp or two, enjoying breakfast in some of the apples. I go for the unchosen apples.

Unfortunately, I soon realize that the wasps are having a doggone Festival of Apple Eating here! They must have advertised far and wide to get this many wasps! The only good thing is they seem disinterested in everything but apples. They seem nearly drunk, if that is possible!

However, I do not trust even potentially drunk wasps, especially in the large numbers I see gathered under the apple tree! Also, I recently read an article about a swarm of bees who attacked a girl in a car. I get a little nervous just thinking about that many bees in one place. So as I picked apples among wasps, I got a mental image of the wasps having a change of attitude, and coming after me! So I guess the apple problem will have to just wait for another time.

Bath time

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Facetious

I've always rather liked the word facetious. Something about the sound of it. Today I liked it even better when I learned it is the only word in the English language with all five main vowels in order. I was mildly disappointed tonight when google search revealed that facetious shares this honor with others. However, I did learn that facetiously is the shortest English word that contains all six vowels in order. Do you ever wonder who thinks up this stuff?